SOL #31 The Top of the Hill

Flat road tires me some but it is the hill in front of me that daunts me. As I get closer, the dread in my stomach grows heavier.  I can turn around now and enjoy the flat road but I want to get to the other side.  I'm just not looking forward to the discomfort and sweat.
Here it is. The bottom of the hill.  I dig my heels down and feel the strength in my quads.  I'm doing it. Wow. I'm stronger than I thought. I push on. I'm going to do it,
Whew. The incline grows steeper. I'm out of my seat now and pushing hard.  Feeling the burn up through my legs I tighten my abs and glutes and push on.  The pedals fight back and the wheels move less smoothly.  Doubt creeps in.  If I turn now, I could coast back home.
The top of the hill is closer now than the bottom.  I should be able to do this. I am barely moving now. It takes everything in me to push one pedal down. I can pull over and lay down in the grass.  One more push. One more push. The top of the hill creeps closer.  One more push. One more push. Loathing and disgust drip with the sweat. But it's one more push. One more push.

SOL #30 Slice of Sunny Spring Saturday

The errands are done and I'm returning home.  One text from one son's friend, a returned call to the other son's friend, plus a quick recruitment of some other neighbors and an impromptu, old fashioned playdate has begun. The back door flys open and closed as more and more weapons resurrect from the basement to supply the battle that has ensued in the back yard.  Armored warriors hang from the base as fighters fly in on the swing. Swords and light sabers lash through the air as pistols and lasers "Pew! Pew! Pew!"
 Little high pitched voices narrate and revise the show that I watch from the kitchen window.
"Im coming to help!"
"Back to the base"
They are playing "Fortnight" the same way my brothers and I played "Star Wars." My mind flips back to the summers of the eighties and forwards to the approaching long days of my boys magical summer.  Childhood is sweet.

SOL #29 The Friday Commute

It's Friday.  No meat.
We had pizza and Italian already this week. 
I could go for a Friday Fish Fry.
I could pick something up
Costco
Supermarket?
Maybe just go out. 
Who would have Fish and chips?
Ooo Flanigans.
That might be too long a wait with the kids.
Red Lobster!!!
Sean loves shrimp on a skewer."Hey, meet us at Red Lobster. Because I don't want Italian again."
Ring
Yes!!!
"Hey meet me at that other place.  My brother wants to take the boys to the movies.  I don't care what they eat.  So what they ate pizza twice already this week."
Yippee!! 

SOL 28 Writer's Garden

"I'm done!"
The dreaded words in a writer's workshop. 

Let's talk about the journey. 
Let's celebrate the growth.
Let's find the parts of the process that you took a hot air balloon ride right over.
Let's get down amongst the weeds and find the flowers and gems.
Let's maybe take a different path than what you first chose.
Let's fertilize this part.
Let's spruce this up a bit.
Let's get rid of the brambles over here.
Let's sit a while and enjoy the view from here.
Here the grass is soft and green and I can float right up to the clouds.
Let's stay a bit more.
Ahhhh!
Let's discover more.

SOL #27 Oprah's On

I miss Oprah. 
I use to spend every day with her.  Somedays we laughed and were silly.  Somedays we got into some serious stuff.  She was the perfect person to spend my after school/ work time with.  My roommate once came into the apartment to tell me something and I hushed quickly, "Oprah and I are talking." She really got me and she made me think in different ways. She validated me. What Would Oprah Do?
There hasn't been a show like that again. 
Not that I would even have the 4:00 - 5:00 time to even watch tv. 
Maybe I miss the wasting time that I use to have. 
Or maybe I still waste time in different ways.  Instead of flipping channels, I'm flipping facebook statuses.
No.
I miss Oprah.

SOL #26 Loving the Trenches

I like being a classroom teacher.  Some of my colleagues have left the classroom to specialize in one area. "C'mon! No report cards.  No parent-teacher nonsense You get to teach one subject and get really good at that subject."

But the thing is, I don't teach subjects.  I teach little humans. I enjoy all the areas we explore together.  I get to see their strengths and help build the bridges across those murky waters.  Yes, there is the parent-teacher nonsense but that comes with the privilege to spend my days with their people. Plus, it always makes for a good story later.
I like being home base.  I love knowing my kids.
I am in the trenches, but I don't want to be anywhere else.

SOL #25 Tired

Tired
Bone Tired
Put my head on the table Tired
Another cup of coffee Tired
Blinking hard dried eyes Tired
Eating junk food just because Tired
Headache tired
Grouchy Tired
Everybody just be quiet Tired
Can't wash my makeup off Tired
Done Tired
Tired